Saturday Morning Wake-Up Call

Finally, Adam and I have finished the book that we have been working on for about 8 months now, Saturday Morning Wake-Up Call - just in time for football season. The book is available for $3.99 from Smashwords.com (and we anticipate it will soon be available at other eBook retailers). We have coupons for a free copy for the first five Minimum Publishable Unit readers to send an email to arkansasfootballbloggers@gmail.com requesting a copy. All other MPU readers can use this coupon code (CK94N) for $3 off the list price until September 27, 2012.

Here is the "Extended Description" of the book:

"The conclusions drawn by analyzing statistics from college and professional football often do not translate to the high school game because the games are so different. This book puts those powerful statistical techniques for maximizing a team's chance of winning into the hands of high school coaches and fans. These techniques are illustrated using the Pulaski Academy Bruins as a case study.

Techniques such as Expected Point Value and Points Per Possession analysis are demonstrated with examples. The authors explore the utility of onside kicks, 4th down decision making, and two point conversion attempts. In addition, the book touches on the aspects of game theory as it relates to the opponents psychological state."

Meltdown at the DePriest House

The Fighting Texas Aggies just lost to the Red Wolves of Arkansas State University. The final score was 18-14. The Ags missed 2 field goals and failed to punch it in with 2nd and goal from the 1. Don't bother calling because I am not answering the phone.

I blame myself. Sophie is not wearing her Aggie Cheerleader uniform. I figured we were playing ASU and the Ags wouldn't need the big guns. I don't think I will make that mistake again. Soph has tried to comfort me the only way a 4 year-old knows how. She gave me a big hug. I did feel better and the game didn't seem important anymore.

I will be ok in a little while. Probably not tonight, but definitely by tomorrow morning. If this had happened 10 years ago, I would have been in a funk for a week. I guess that is called "perspective". I just hope this whole season doesn't need a lot of this kind of perspective.

By the way, I wouldn't call Chip or Cable after this particular game. They haven't figured out this perspective thing yet. I hope your teams fared better this weekend.

College Football Returns!!!

Well, it has been over 8 months since the last college game. The wait for real football (not spring games, recruiting, or NFL exhibition games) is over. I am very excited about it. College football is my favorite sport these days (once this was major league baseball). Sadly, the two teams that I am interested in watching are playing "directional" schools, so they will not be on television.

I gave you my reasons for hating soccer last week, so this week I will give you my reasons for loving college football.

Debates -- The system of determining a champion in college football's highest classification is so screwed up that it actually encourages debates about "Mythical National Champions". For example, invite an Alabama and Arkansas fan to your next party and ask them who won the 1964 National Championship. I bet they have different answers. Arkansas's argument is so legitimate that the AP changed their rules after that season.

Teams You Love To Hate -- To about half of the population of college football fans, the Fighting Irish are a symbol of all that is wrong with our country (entitlement, elitist, etc.) while the other half believes that Notre Dame is the best team on the planet. My list of teams that I want to see lose every Saturday includes Notre Dame, Ohio State, Michigan, Miami, Oklahoma and Texas. I would likely throw a big party if all were to lose on the same day.

Irrational Fans -- These are the guys that lurk on message boards for the faintest hint that a 17-year old from Timbuktu who runs a 4.3 40-yard dash has included their school in his final three. It is kind of sad that their weekends can be ruined because the whims of a teenager didn't include attending their favorite school. These irrational fans include my dad who begins EVERY season with the expectation that the Razorbacks will lose at most 2 games because, "The Hogs are good, but you know how stout the SEC is. You KNOW that they would win any other conference."

Rivalries -- Michigan/OSU, USC/Notre Dame, Texas/Texas A&M (the BEST ONE!), etc. Sure, I know the Yankees and Red Sox don't like each other, but you will see the players that play for both teams during their career. The same goes for the Bears and Packers. In college football, they play 3 hours for 365 days of bragging rights that can't be escaped until the next clash with that rival. You will find strange and humiliating wagers associated with these games.

So, if you are wondering my plans for weekends over the next few months, I will be trying to find someway to watch football on Saturdays. If fate is kind to me, the Aggies will be on TV. If not, I will be re-living the last two Fridays after Thanksgiving. I have bragging rights until that day. That's when they go up for grabs in the Lonestar Showdown.

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**Cross Posted at the Arkansas 7-on-7 Football.

Kindred Spirits*

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Well, my soccer post generated more than just a comment. In my email, I had a note from my buddy Cable who was mentioned in the post. He has put even more thought into his hatred of the foul Un-American game that is soccer. I asked him if I could put the email into my blog. He has agreed.

So, what should you know about Cable? He is a nuclear engineer working as a researcher at Texas A&M. He will finish his Ph.D. soon, right Cable? He has two kids and a very patient wife. I imagine living with him is almost as difficult as living with me. Basically, I believe that the only thing that has ever caused us to disagree is an R. C. Slocum/Jackie Sherrill debate that has gone on for at least 10 years now. He has finally (reluctantly) admitted that the dismissal of R. C. as the Aggies head coach was a mistake.

Without further ado, here is Cable's top ten list. It even finishes with a David Letterman twist.

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*Post by Guest Blogger Cable Kurwitz

Hey Russ,

Nice article. You should read this Guardian editorial. However, there is growing evidence that it is a weak link [between soccer and communism/socialism].

I continue to stand by my soccer = socialism theory and feel Jack Kemp said it best when he stated, "a distinction should be made that football is democratic capitalism, whereas soccer is a European socialist sport." I do not agree with Franklin Foer who stated in his book, “[soccer] represents a direct threat to American culture and tradition.” I felt his conclusions were more anti-American than anti-soccer. I dislike the global game of soccer because of its simplicity, constantly running clock, and the idea that you could essentially never take risks and tie every match. I dislike the European terms, the lack of grading, and/or the failure to develop a method of accurately grading players performance. Most of all, I dislike the continued desire by those socialists within our borders to be more like the world and embrace soccer. As Europe slouches back toward socialism and a communist wave pours over South America, I realize that doing the opposite of what world thinks is the better course of action. So, with this in mind, here is my top 10 list of arguments against soccer:

1. Soccer is the ultimate game of the state that seeks to smash the individual and promote the state. Why do you always see the shots of the Proletariat cheering with the little, faceless players on the large expanse of some super stadium with a name like The Giant of Alberdi or the Big Stick? Baseball is perfect because it promotes the individual. A bad pitcher can’t be helped by the rest of the team. Also, because all 162 games in baseball count (no friendlies), one can compile statistics to accurately rank each player. As in America, the individual triumphs.
2. Why do the officials appear to be secret police types with black uniforms?
3. What is a yellow or red card? Do you collect them like baseball cards? What would you do if someone ran up and shoved a yellow index card in your face? I would have a hard time not laughing or ripping it up and handing it back to Mr. KGB.
4. My favorite example is the organized hooligans associated with each team similar to the Nazi stormtroopers or red guards. Heck, this is celebrated in Berkeley with a match of anarchists named after the Kronstadt or communist aptly named the Left Wing.
5. Everyone gets an equal chance to play!
6. As one city official told me (and I later saw on TV), “We don’t keep score so everyone wins.”
7. As Russ mentioned, soccer is played with the feet like some animal versus proper sports that utilize our hands.
8. Why is the timing of the world cup similar to the typical Russian/Chinese 5 year plan?
9. Soccer is the only sport with the capability of ruining a WWII Stallone movie.
10. Finally, soccer shoe maker Umbro markets the Zyklon shoe. What a gas!

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Thanks, Cable. I don't feel like the lone kook on this one anymore. There are at least two of us.

Why I Hate Soccer

Over the years, people have noticed that I have distinct dislike for the game of soccer. When people first asked about the hostility toward futbol, I would usually say something like, "It is boring." The dislike was actually a gut feeling that went beyond the fact that the game is boring. I just didn't know how to say, "I have a visceral hatred for the game that I can't quite define."

Years later, my buddy (Cable) brought forth the theory that the popularity of soccer in Latin America was well correlated with the spread of communism in the same region. So, for lack of a better explanation, this became my answer when I was asked about the growing hostility toward the game. I know that correlation is not the same as causation, but I wanted to avoid being associated with anything that might be communistic.

After pondering the question for some time, I think I have finally hit on the real answer. First, I believe that three things separate humans from animals: (1) a soul; (2) the ability to reason; and (3) opposable thumbs. While I don't want to call soccer players and fans soulless (even though it is possible), I think that the game of soccer insults at least two of these three differences. In other words, it draws us closer to animals rather than further from them.

Here is how soccer works against reason. The basis of the human intellect and reason is our brain. A very hard skull protects it from injury. Parents are now putting helmets on kids for all manner of activities. In sports that have the possibility of head injury, they put on helmets. The athletes getting prepared for football, baseball, cycling, hockey, and NASCAR stop to put on a helmet to protect their brain. Think about that. The redneck climbing into a race car puts on a helmet while youth soccer coaches encourage kids to go home and practice hitting the soccer ball with their heads. This is contrary to every human instinct of protecting the brain. The only other sport that comes close to this is the brutality of professional boxing.

Soccer violates another of the differences between humans and animals when it requires the players to ignore their hands. Other sports (basketball, tennis, curling, even poker) pay homage to the fact that we have opposable thumbs and can pick up and control tools with our hands. In soccer, you can be kicked out of the game for exercising the instinct to use your hands.

So, there you have it. That's why I hate soccer.

AND, I didn't even get into the non-competitive attitude of youth soccer and how that will damage American competitiveness in the world economy. Before you say it, that doesn't make me a kook.

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Here is a very good article about the some of the problems facing the nuclear renaissance that I wrote about earlier.

Friday Funny

It has been a tough week (MPU-wise) because nothing I have read recently in science reporting has spun me up enough to generate another post. I have been working about 12 hour days while I was on the road this week, so I haven't had a chance to read much in the way of science news. Instead of offending AGW-alarmists, this Friday morning I have decided to offend another group of people: Texas Tceh Graduates Who Can Read. I believe that this is a small group, and the way that I will offend them will probably make large groups of people laugh.

Kristy has written all about the "L-word" and the feelings about Tceh at our house, but then she gave a reason to like the town. What a sell out! Here is a picture and a video that should fix any rehabilitation that she has done in the minds of people out there.



And people wonder why the Texas Aggies spell Tceh the way that we do. Aggies are nice people, and we are just trying to make any Red Raiders around feel better about themselves. Many of you will have seen this one, but this Tceh freshman has his dream job. He gets to be the bell ringer at Jones Stadium.

AND, he gets to ring that bell on national television. I am going to meet my young nephew (Wylie) over the weekend, so you may not see a new post for a few days. I hope you at least got a good chuckle at Tceh's expense. Have a great weekend.

A Really Tough Problem

After reading my last post, Kristy told me that I probably needed to write something "a little perkier". After re-reading the post myself, I figured that she was probably right. However, I am home sick and the three of us (Kristy, Sophie and me) are sharing a really nasty cold. So, cheerful thoughts are hard to come by right now. Having written that, my current random thought is definitely more light-hearted and is a dilemma that I have encountered in the last 6-9 months. It does require some explaining for those outside of Arkansas.

If you grow up or live in Arkansas, the Razorbacks are your team. The state does not have any major league franchises, and the only professional teams are two AA baseball teams (Arkansas Travelers and Northwest Arkansas Naturals), an Arena Football League 2 football team (Arkansas Twisters), and an NBA Developmental League team (Arkansas Rimrockers -- did not play a 2007-2008 season). In case you weren't keeping track, those teams have players that are at least 2 steps from the bigs in every sport. That is precisely why the Hogs are the only game in the state of Arkansas for football, basketball, and baseball.

Most residents of Arkansas are what Texas Aggies would deride as "T-shirt fans" because they have no real ties with school (i.e., they didn't attend the University of Arkansas and maybe have never been on the campus), but they will buy t-shirts, hats, hog-noses, bumper stickers, etc.

Why worry about t-shirt fans? Well, for Aggies, it is because they are usually the most vocal, obnoxious Texas Longhorn fans that you will find on the planet. (Actually, no, that award should probably go to the Texas Tech fans.) If you are a Texas Aggie fan, it is generally because you have some link to the school, but if you root for the 'horns it is likely that you jumped on the bandwagon because they were good at some point and you wanted to cheer for a good team. I think this is probably true in lots of places (Oklahoma/Oklahoma State; Michigan/Michigan State; Alabama/Auburn) where a state divides its loyalty. So, Aggies have a general disdain for the entire universe of t-shirt fans regardless of university.

Anyway, I had no problem with being a t-shirt fan before I went to Texas A&M because my undergraduate school (Hendrix College) wasn't a "big time" athletic program (or even small time athletic program for that matter). After spending five years in College Station and developing a passion for Aggie athletics, it felt a little odd to cheer wholeheartedly for the Razorbacks. Don't get me wrong. I never cheered for them to lose, but it didn't upset me if they lost. My dad and brother couldn't understand my "conversion," and they were shocked when I didn't always see the officiating or the rest of the world through the same cardinal-colored glasses. (Actually, I think they considered kicking me out of the family.)

Well, last September, I became an adjunct faculty member in the University of Arkansas's Center for Microelectronics & Photonics (I know, irony), and last February, I was appointed the Assistant Director of the Center. I have recently become a "full-time" Hog fan because I am bombarded with Razorback news and notes. I don't even feel like I am a t-shirt fan because I have ties to the school.

Now, here is the dilemma. Just recently, the Aggies and Razorbacks signed a 10-year deal to play football every year in the Dallas Cowboys new stadium (aka, Jerry's World). So, here is where you can help me. What should I do when my two favorite teams play next fall (and every year after)? Should I "woo pig" or should I "gig 'em"?

A. Be happy that one of my favorite teams will win.
B. Be down that one of my favorite teams will lose.
C. Pick the better team each year and cheer for them.
D. Go camping and find out who won later.

You Make the Call

When I watched this play at the end of the Texas A&M/UCLA game in the NCAA tournament, I thought, "Man, that really looked like a foul." Actually, I screamed "FOUL!" really loud at the TV - only to be told by the announcers that the final score was 53-49 (or something like that). This play made the difference between an overtime game and a UCLA win.

What do you think? Foul or clean play?



If you said "clean play," you are obviously a UCLA fan or ESPN's Doug Gottlieb. He actually said that Texas A&M should not complain about officiating. He claimed that the referees had called a good game. He said something like, "It was just good hard-nosed defense." I was dumbfounded by the comment because I doubt that A&M would have gotten the benefit of the same call had the roles been reversed.

The good news is that the A&M player is back on campus after coming out of the trauma-induced coma he suffered when he hit the floor after this hard-nosed defense.

Anyway, I needed to get that off my chest because it has been stewing for about 3 weeks.

Yankees Versus Redsox (Or More BS)

Although this blog started as a rant against bad science, I thought I would calm from my rants on that subject for at least one post. That's right, I am going to rant about something that REALLY irritates me. I absolutely cannot stand the way that the dang New York Yankees versus the Boston Redsox is being foisted upon me day after day (and year after year). I think this is another example of an overblown importance the media provides to this rivalry. The media giants are located there, so these teams are the most important in the universe.

Recently, we got to hear about the absolute silliness about a Redsox jersey being in the concrete of the new Yankee stadium. Then, we had to hear about how they were removing the jersey because the Yankees couldn't bear the thought of it being there in perpetuity. (Actually, some structural engineer probably told them they had to dig it out because of the weakness that might result from the impurity in the concrete.) Now, we have to breathlessly await what will happen during the next weekend series. Sorry, I am not buying what these clowns are selling.

First, I grew up in the South. If not explicitly taught, it was understood that Yankees are generally not nice people. While I have somewhat overcome my difficulties with Yankees (thanks, Jen and Chris), I don't care a bit for the baseball teams up there. Actually, the word "hate" comes to mind when I think of the baseball Yankees. They are the epitomy of what I think is wrong with baseball. "Oh, we didn't win the championship last year. Let's spend another hundred million to get four other teams' best players."

Next, only people from the Northeast care about these teams. Sure, there are tons of people that live there, but give us a break. The lowest ratings in the history of the World Series occurred when the Mets played the Yankees a few years back. It seems that no one in the rest of the country much cared what happened after the players got off the subway.

Finally, we have to listen to this shhh, I mean, stuff for 19 times (or how many ever games they play) each year. We also have to hear pre-series, post-game, and post-series coverage. And, don't forget the introspective pieces, the "Behind the Lines" specials, the Ken Burns Baseball: Special Edition, etc.

I know how it feels to be a Yankee. I spent five years in College Station, Texas. To some of the guys I met down there, I was a Yankee because I came from north of the Red River. So, I guess the definition of Yankee varies by location. But PLEASE, stop with the Yankees versus Redsox BS already.

This is either really irritating or I am really in need of NCAA football to start up again soon. As I think about it, it is probably both.


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As a side note, I have added a couple of items to my list of 101 Things About Me.